closing my eyes in the sun

though sometimes i feel as if i “know-it-all” i have much to learn. there are so many things from the past that revamp my future and serve to forever change my life. sometimes i find it hard to believe i've made it this far!? today i laid in the grass and stared at the sky until my eyes began burning from the sun. the clouds weren't even moving and i felt as though because of that, time itself had stopped. i closed my eyes for a while and thought about the person i will be in 20 years. nothing real in depth, i wondered if my hair will be long, if i'll have kids, be married, be content, and have fulfilled some of the things that today, seem like i'll never get the chance to do. there was an indescribable blue tint on everything around me and a light headed sensation when i opened my eyes. i don't know what that is but whenever i close my eyes in the sun for awhile, when i open them up again that always happens. sometimes i forget about things like that...it's been a while since i've just closed my eyes in the sun. which reminds me that time eventually runs out, it is a phenomenal thing and it changes us all, yet sometimes we stay the same. it has the ability to stop (or so it felt like it today), and grant us moments of serenity. it's like the wrinkles on my grandmother’s face, they continue to form yet i see her the same as she was when i was a little girl, like no time has gone by at all. nevertheless, time is precious, but not promised. i'm going to close my eyes in the sun more.....